2013. december 21., szombat

I'm a writer

There is a funny thing about writing. Sandor Weores, arguably one of the greatest 20th century Hungarian writers, said:

"There are only two professions that can be done without any practice: one is poetry and prose, and the other is politics."

These days I'm not willing to accept any kind of advice. Whatever people say around me I just try to pretend as if nothing happened. But this one right here has just penetrated the fragile resiliance built by my pride and ego. Just think about it! Even if you are a little emotional, you turn to writing. No, you don't have a friend there to listen, let's say your relatives aren't there to help. You didn't learn to play any instrument so that's not a choice either; you can't find peace nor the answer in nature. No, you got to stay on your ass and fix your tiny little broken heart as fast as you can. So grab your pen, your keyboard, typewriter or anything that can leave a trace! And write it out. Let the writer within just unfold! Yeah, you don't have to be taught for that; without further ado, your basic education has given you enough to know "B" comes right after "A". There are few places left on earth where writing is unknown. Thus, most of us really know how to do it.

People proclaim they are writers. Why hello there, self-proclaimed writer! What makes you really one of those classic, socitey-molding, leading, revolutionizing guys (girls)? Telling you are a writer doesn't really prove a point here. You got your diary, your blog, your collection of fancy documents, written or typed, soaked with self-hatred, passion, pain and all the usual sufferings of an average human being. So do you really think that makes you one of those people? The holy group of writers?

Fuck, it doesn't.

Loving your own words, being compassionate towards your own emotions and deeply understanding yourself doesn't imply you are a writer. Even insane people write. Serial killers write. Assholes write (OK, assholes can be writers actually, for eg. Ernest has beaten up once one of his criticizers while showing off his chest hair). And emotionally hurt people write. Furthermore, emotionally hurt, insane, asshole serial killers write. That's the lovely thing about it. Like digital cameras. You grab one and you pretend you are a professional. Take that pen! Read some guys' novels and combine the two! There you go, you are a writer now!

But as Mr Weores said earlier, politicians and writers go hand-in-hand these days. You say you are one of them, you keep on repeating it and one day people will forget you are actually nothing but just an emotionally hurt, insane, asshole serial killer. That's how things work today.

And that is, why I'm a writer.